The BMT stories continue at metastasis. From Sgt X to Sgt Y. Excerpts below.
Also a good read, at Balderdash, Agagooga on his last days at 42SAR.
metastasis writes from a BMT perspective, Agagooga writes as an NSMan about to ORD (or ROD, as we old-timers called it), that is, about to finish his tour of duty. Funny stuff. Excerpts below too.
"Sergeant Y: 'Okay, everyone half-left down. Carry on twenty.'
(Platoon asks for permission and carries on twenty. Rinse and repeat a few times with different sorts of exercises.)
'Hey, listen up platoon one. I don't want to see you all with that shacked face. When you train, I want you to smile. Because you should be enjoying yourself at all times. Now everyone better go and smile. If I catch anyone not smiling, everyone will drop twenty.'
(Platoon continues with exercises, smiling. Some time passes.)
'Eh, you! Half-f**k smile! Not good enough. Okay, now I want everyone to laugh for exactly three seconds after each set. Carry on twenty platoon one burpees [a burpee with two push-ups incorporated].'
Platoon: 'One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight one HAHAHAHAHAHA! Two-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight one HAHAHAHAHAHA! Three-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight three HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!'"
"We were given the Definitive List of Contraband for SAF servicemen returning from overseas. As one might expect, it is considerably more draconian than the Definitive List of Contraband for Civilians returning from overseas. Among some of the more questionable inclusions: Non-MITA approved/censored media (I don't think MITA will go all the way there just to approve/censor media. Therefore, all media from overseas is banned. Bravo!), Chewing Gum (Wth?! I thought Singaporeans can bring in small amounts for personal consumption. It's sale that's prohibited), Computer Media/Software (?! I attribute this to general SAF paranoia) and Audio CDs (I don't think recitations of Koranic verses are illegal in Singapore, unless the SAF thinks they incite people to become suicide bombers). Heck, Brunei is even more puritan than Singapore - if something is banned here, it will definitely be banned there, except for chewing gum, that is. At this rate, the only souvenirs we will be able to get are "I went to Brunei and all I was allowed to get was this lousy T-shirt" T-shirts!
On the list of Dos and Don't for Lancer: "Do not tease the Bruneian women in public." Does this mean we can tease them in private?""
