I have been playing with the addictive new website "What Would I Say?", that digs through your old Facebook activity and uses the info to create future status updates based on what you talk about and the way you say things.
Some of the stuff that it throws out there is bizarre, and sometimes downright poetic and uncannily like me.
Here are some of the status updates created by my KinMunbot:
1. "Eldershield Hipster A naughty girl for all of us today."
2. "Looking at the hype and now, the Vulcans will come for us."
3. "Wah, this is probably Tuesday or pangsai here. It's like regressing to be releasing the whole sad that it will be my temptation is beyond trash."
4. "Trimming will happy."
5. "I am very blessed to resist the Morning."
6. "Dear Facebook, please pour all you want to interact with, dammit."
7. "N95 masks today, to be an Olympic sport."
8. "Android fanboys taunt and troll. Rinse and repeat."
9. "I've forgotten how sucky it is a new Old Nokia SU8W Bluetooth folding keyboard with my iPad mini instead of the aliens. Me *clickclickclick*"
10. "Gahmen says we would need two sweaters Sorry mommy! I tried to rhyme but a moderate 74 Baluku hailstorm."
11. "Many randy old angmoh couple at TAMPINES!"
12. When the PSI hits 200, SELL!"
13. "WAH LAU eh, the bottle!"
14. "Just saw the dingding icecream BEFORE the Rest of the simple pleasures of being wet."
15. "Making the SCDF emergency sound."
16. "Aircon room next door Welcome to America."
17. "Emo is fine."
18. "Emo is carrying a paraphrase of the pain."
19. "Goh Chok Tong the pink tshirt with extra Masaleh, right? My brother and Matt Damon never ceases to update."
In the hullabaloo of reviewing report books and exam results of my two younger ones, we found out that our firstborn, Faith, who has autism, was given a silver award for art at special school. The school gave her a trophy, certificate and cash voucher too.
I saw some of her work when we met the very dedicated teachers at her special school for our regular case conferences (parent-teacher meetings) on her progress. The teachers told me she really enjoys the art lessons.
Sure, she needs a little help holding the tools (she has low muscle tone) but she made the pieces and enjoyed the creative process, which is a win all by itself.
Her teachers framed one batik piece and made a book cover with the other. We've put it on the family mantle (ok, we don't really have a mantle; it's the shoe cabinet at the front door but it's a prominent place).
Faith must've liked her trophy a lot, because when my mom tried to help her with it, she refused to let grandma take it, haha!
When I found out my old school chum, Colin Goh, was in town for Singapore Writers Festival this year, I thought, "Great, can catch up with him because it has been a long time since we met up in New York."
But the fella was super-busy lah. So Miyagi and I were thinking, how to meet this International Groberlist filmmaker-cum-comic-writer-cum-talkingcocker?
Then Colin messaged me and asked me, "Eh! Want to come to my spur-of-the-moment Singlish salon at Jing Hua Restaurant at Qun Zhong Eating House - 京华小吃 (21 Neil Rd) on Monday at 7 pm?"
Wah, Singlish Literary Salon leh! In a noisy dumpling restaurant leh! With many cool and fun artistic peoples leh! And can talk cock sing song in Singlish!
The speakers included: Kirpal Singh, Felix Cheong, Ann Ang, Joshua Ip, Alvin Pang, Christine Chia, Miyagi, KF Seetoh (who was there in spirit), international guests David Musgrave (from Australia) and the super-tokong Kosal Khiev (Cambodia/USA), and me.
We spoke with a tiny mic and a tiny speaker, over the din of the dumpling restaurant (Jing Hua makes the bestest sia!) that had customers dining in the same location as our little informal event.
It was the most fun I've had in months. Thanks for organizing this, Colin! Must do again!
Bonus: Kosal Khiev's performance at the event, courtesy of Alvin Pang.
17. @mrbrown: Decide to have unplanned maintenance. #HowToBeAManlyMan
18. @mrbrown: Give up the car and drive a Sampan 2.0. #HowToBeAManlyMan
19. @jackyan: Instagram in the middle of a street. #howtobeamanlyman
20. @mrbrown: Leave the house with your smartphone WITHOUT a spare battery pack. #HowToBeAManlyMan
21. @TohJeffrey: Put 青草油 (damn pain medical oil) Without Crying #HowToBeAManlyMan
22. @LeslieBodoh: DON'T carry your significant other's handbag. #HowToBeAManlyMan (Unless she is hanging off a cliff and holding onto it. -mb)
23. @mrbrown: Does not feel a need to speed up when someone else wants to filter into lane. #HowToBeAManlyMan
24. @tbhIANpls: Confess to playing Pokemon. #HowToBeAManlyMan
25. @ThatBakaBrendan: Letting your girlfriend tie ribbons on your hair #HowToBeAManlyMan
26. @lukewobbles: Open a bottle of beer with my nipple #HowToBeAManlyMan
27. @xploded_tb: #HowToBeAManlyMan Scream like a girl when faced with danger.
28. @HXXIV: Don't flinch when getting eyebrows threaded. #HowToBeAManlyMan
29. @ShirleyMichelle: Drive without a GPS #HowToBeAManlyMan
30. @finalaeon: Pluck nose hair #HowToBeAManlyMan
31. @arnoldgoh: Wash your face with Jif #HowToBeAManlyMan
32. @mrbrown: Tattoo the sole of your foot. #HowToBeAManlyMan
33. @hongkongpony: Walk a chihuahua like it's a doberman. #HowToBeAManlyMan
34. @mrnamer: Shave with a chopper #HowToBeAManlyMan
35. @Fake_PMLee: Put “sea-hum” in Mee Siam. #HowToBeAManlyMan
36. @ChoiMaine: Go half naked around the house like my dad #HowToBeAManlyMan
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Their video for the week of November the 6th is entitled "Ways to be a Manly Man". The question for the week is: How many times does the PIXMA printer appear throughout the video? – tell them the answer and why you deserve a new printer & the most creative answer stands to win some neat prizes.
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Apparently today's situation of many gahmen sites being down wasn't a hack and nobody tripped over the power cable.
From IDA Singapore: "Dear all, Government websites are under planned maintenance. Such planned maintenance is usually undertaken during the weekends and public holidays due to low expected website traffic. The maintenance took longer than expected, due to technical difficulties. Maintenance of the websites is progressively being completed. We apologise for the inconvenience caused."
Today's loud and thundery storm reminded me of the children's church that the wife and I saw on vacation last year. The awesome building belongs to His Place Community Church in Burlington, Washington.
If I had an ark in Singapore, there wouldn't be space for pairs of animals, because it would be an HDB ark.