This SMS exchange took place one night, after 5 blokes decided to have a late dinner at Dunman Market, to eat the famous Eng’s Wanton Mee. Besides the tasty and firm egg noodles, Eng’s chilli is renowned for its potency, so strong that it is known as “gunpowder” by his regulars.
Dr Bob, Capt Ang, Long Dong Tan, KTV Mel, and I made the little trip. We all stayed to eat at the market, but Mel being the good husband, “packet” home to his wife awaiting her dinner.
On the way back, KTV Mel sms-ed this to us:
Mel: U r not going to believe this. Cab with hooker pick me up. She in front seat. But i m going home. Think she is his gf.
I sms-ed back:
Me: Don’t worry, we will back your story up too, if your wife asks.
Later that night, he sent this sms:
Mel: My wife, a self-proclaimed chilli expert, is reeling from the gunpowder. Ha
The next morning, I saw the sms and replied:
Me: Ah yes. That gunpowder wanton mee has a way of doing that to former self-proclaimed experts of chilli. If she was reeling, wait till she goes to the loo. Heheh.
Mel: That explains what happened this morning.
Me: Fire in the hole?
After laughing my (sore) ass off, I decided to see if there were other victims of Eng’s “gunpowder”. So I sent out a group sms to the rest. I also tried to call Dr Bob, but he did not pick up.
Me: Anyone else got “fire in the hole”? Heheh.
Long Dong was the first to reply.
Long Dong: You don’t need more than 2 lah.
Me: I am not talking about a card here.
Long Dong: I have an old version. About two years old. You want?
Long Dong: Counterstrike for PC
Me: No. I meant you have been to the loo yet? On account of the chilli.
Long Dong called, finally understanding my question. He had already gone to the loo twice in the morning, and was in fact awaken by his first, er, run. Dr Bob also replied finally.
Dr Bob: You call? Guess where I was, yup the toilet man. All hell broke lose.
By now, I was really curious. What had happened to Capt Ang? Dr Bob and Long Dong only took a dash of the gunpowder (the wimps) and left the rest by the side of their plates, and they were already casualties. Capt Ang stirred the whole lot of chilli into his noodles. Surely he would also be on fire?
I called the man, and our hero was more than fine. In fact, after eating with us, he went home, ate dinner again (the family cooked), then played Ninja Gaiden on his Xbox till the early hours of the morning, slept a bit and woke up at 6am to go to work.
Iron Man Ang, I salute you.