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the mrbrown show: election renovation

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Bolo Santosi of Just Cause 2: A Singaporean accent in a US game?

Bolo Santosi is quickly becoming a cult figure in the gaming world, with her terrible voice acting, campy dialogue and the all-powerful Singaporean accent. In fact she sounds like a Masters of the Sea reject (a very old Singapore tv series known for its badness).

This stuff is so bad, it is good.

Who is the voice of Bolo Santosi? The world wants to know!

Update: Some readers have asked me if this is for real or something my mrbrown show team made up. I want to declare formally that no, I did not make this shit up. This is FOR REAL.

Some choice comments from gaming forums mainly in the US:

"I love this game just her VA (Voice Acting) is just so terribad."

"It sounds to me like she should be reading fortunes over the phone."

"She should never be allowed to say 'people' 'comrade' or 'metal' ever again."

"I hate her voice. I hate her face. I also hate that manly walk she does to the chopper."

"I wanna rip out her vocal chords! Her accent is so damn annoying."

"Every time Bolo Santosi speaks I want to hit her voice actress with a brick."

"I die a little inside every time Bolo Santosi opens her f**king mouth. I still can't bring myself to skip cutscenes."

"That Bolo Santosi woman might actually be the worst voice I've ever heard in a videogame."

"What is the problem everyone seems to have with her? She has a heavy accent but it sounds reasonably exotic to me."

Earth Hour 2010 with the browns and friends

Observing Earth Hour with my wife and buddies with some candlelight, strawberries and Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey, Phish Food and Turtle Soup ice-cream. Yum.

Ben Mok, Pedal On

A memorial website has been set up for Benjamin Mok at www.benmokpedalon.com.

As a responsible and safe cyclist, Ben would’ve appealed for calm in light of the situation. Fellow cyclists who wish to show their support for Ben are advised to attend the funeral mass with their cycling helmets instead. Please be appropriately dressed for church.

Benjamin, a.k.a ~ben who wrote at pedaldamnit.blogspot.com, was one of two cyclists knocked down by a suspected drink driver, along Clementi Road, towards Upper Bukit Timah Road, on Sunday, 21st March 2010 at 2125 hours. Ben passed away on Wednesday 24th March 2010 at 0614 hours at NUH. (Read news report here.)

Jim Burlant once said, "Cycling is like church. Many attend, but few understand.". Ben understood it totally.

The funeral mass will be held on the 27th March 2010, Saturday, 3pm at:
The Church of St Mary of the Angels
La Verna Room
5 Bukit Batok East Avenue 2, Singapore 659918

Cremation is scheduled for 1630 hrs at:
Mandai Crematorium & Columbarium
300, Mandai Road, Singapore 779393
Hall 3

Farewell, ~ben

I just found that one of the two cyclists who were hit by a 62-year-old doctor in a suspected drink-driving hit-and-run accident on Clementi Road heading towards Upper Bukit Timah Road, has passed away.

He was 35 years old.

Rest in peace, ~ben.

Your passion for life was an inspiration to us all.

The Wife's Big Day Out

It was soon to be the wife's Big Birthday, and I wanted to do something nice for her to celebrate this major milestone. Last year, for mine, she got together with my friends and gave me a surprise dinner, so I knew I had to try and surprise her as well.

The operation took several people and a month to plan. Daniel, Jessica and Geok Shan, from agencies who represented Ben & Jerry's (my favourite ice-cream folks), asked me if I wanted to "punk" someone with a day of kindness. I told them, yes. And I wanted that person to be my wife.

The idea was that we would create a perfect day for her. Things would go her way the whole day. For instance, she would go to work, and get a free cab ride out of the blue.

Then we had our first major hiccup. She told me she had applied for leave on the day of her birthday.

That meant a mad scramble to change the plans we had in mind. A revised schedule was hastily put together. We found out that she had booked a massage session for the two of us using a credit card offer she had, for Sunday.

"We need the spa appointment to be at Monday, 5pm so that you can go to the dinner after," said Jessica.

I called the wife and told her maybe we should change our appointment from Sunday to Monday.

"I thought you are working on my birthday?"

"Er, I can take leave lah. So Monday ok?"

So she called the spa to change it to Monday as I asked, and they told her they only had 5pm available. This was because by now, we had roped them in too.

It was now Sunday night, the night before her birthday.

I told her that I had just gotten free tickets to visit Universal Studios Singapore, to check out the attractions we missed the first time we were there. She thought that was a great way to spend the morning.

We got up early, had a lovely breakfast at the market (even ordered the noodles that was always sold out when we visited on weekends), then I told her, "Oh, we don't need to worry about transport to Resorts World, we are riding there in a limousine."

She was quite thrilled to hear we had such a nice ride.

"At our disposal all day?" she asked. I said yes, and came up with some excuse that I was supposed to review the limousine service for my blog.

Off we went in our black limo to Sentosa. We checked out the attractions we missed the first time, like the Waterworld show, the Lights Camera Action show, and the Enchanted Airways mini-coaster (a milder roller coaster for kids). This time we avoided the big coaster rides because A) we already tried them and B) she didn't want to get too dizzy so early in the day.

Over lunch, the wife commented how smoothly the day had unfolded, like the sun was shining just for us today. I smiled.

Then Dino, our driver swung by to pick us up to get us to Elements Spa for our 5pm appointment at Cathay. I texted Daniel that we were on the way and he texted back that the team was rushing from Resorts World and told me not to get there too early.

I had to stall for time so I told the wife, let's have a drink first. Now the wife is a stickler for punctuality and she looked a little worried that we would be late for the appointment. I told her we had plenty of time, nooooo worries.

Then I got word that my co-conspirators had arrived and sucking up the rest of my teh-si kosong, I told the wife we could go.

At the spa counter, Daniel was waiting, looking the part. I tried my best not to burst out laughing. Jessica pretended to be a customer and sat quietly at the waiting area.

My wife told him we had an appointment at 5pm and he checked and then declared, "Congratulations! You are our 10,000th customer and we are upgrading your massage to a full 2 hour scrub and massage session, for FREE!"

The wife was pleasantly surprised. "Free? For both of us?" she asked.

"Yes!" said Daniel, "Now may I see your IC? I need to record your particulars." Then he proceeded to write on some random scrap of paper. Which my wife later told me she noticed but did not question.

"Wow, so nice. And it is my birthday too. What a nice surprise," said the wife.

One of the actual spa staff called out to Daniel, "Boss, boss, need to take photo of them and you."

The actual boss of the place sportingly volunteered to take the photo of us with Daniel the "Boss". She grabbed the Polaroid camera and tried to use it, but had some trouble operating it. So she handed the camera to Jessica, the random "customer".

Jessica did her best to pretend like it is the most normal thing for a customer to help take a photo of another customer who had just won something. Once again, the wife noticed this unusual glitch in the Matrix but was too happy with her free spa package to think too much of it.

We had our spa session, all two hours of it, and it was time for dinner. Our driver, Dino, came swooping over in his S-Class to drive us to Sushi Yoshida, a lovely little place at Devonshire Road. In the car, my wife sent a status update to her Facebook with the word, "Memorable."

She didn't know how much more memorable it was going to be.

Once we sat down, before I could even order, the waitress told us the chef will prepare the entire meal for us. The wife again felt it strange but thought, this must be one of those places where you eat whatever the chef prepares. She did not notice that I did not even ask how much it would cost me.

We ate sashimi, sushi and a host of exotic Japanese dishes. In the middle of dinner, the restaurant burst into a Happy Birthday song... for another customer.

"Aiyoh, so paiseh," my wife said with a smile. "You better don't do that to me ah. Hahaha!"

I smiled again.

When we reached our last course, it was the cue for Daniel, Jessica and the rest of the gang who planned this Big Day to pop up with a tub of Chunky Monkey ice-cream with a candle on it (it is her fave flavour, I told the team).

"Happy birthday!" they chorused.

The wife was also told that she was the first recipient of Ben & Jerry's Free Cone Day, since she is getting her free ice-cream a day earlier than the day itself.

They took some photos of my still bewildered wife and me, shot a little video, and disappeared as quickly as they appeared, discreetly leaving us to enjoy the rest of our evening.

The wife took the rest of the evening to piece together the day, replaying the day to see where the clues were. "Like a movie plot," she laughed.

She was totally overwhelmed but very happy. Thanks to Ben & Jerry's for helping me shower my wife with a perfect Big Day. I think I scored enough brownie points to last for the next decade.

Photoshop Fail: The Ball Pool of Hell

via @izadd77

Seen at a Best Denki in Bishan

I like how Best Denki Bishan managed to spell HP's name wrongly for every HP product in their store.

CNNGo Podcast: Kids say the cutest things, at 5am while waiting for the bus

This is a new podcast series I am doing for CNNGo.com, where I interview interesting people. My first interviewee, I decided, would be my 6-year-old son, Isaac.

We did this chat while waiting for his school bus to arrive, one very early morning.

Listen to the podcast: Kids say the cutest things, at 5am while waiting for the bus.

the mrbrown show: pok-kai face

Prices getting out of your reach? Show your pok-kai face at mrbrownshow.com!

CNNGo column: It's finally open — First look (and ride) at Universal Studios Singapore

Latest CNNGo.com "Say What? with mrbrown" column: It's finally open — First look (and ride) at Universal Studios Singapore

Excerpt:

I am a theme park junkie. It started when my father took me to Gay World amusement park, in the days when the word meant carefree or happy. We had the best of times on the carousel, in the vomit-inducing rotating teacup rides, and the electric bumper cars. There was even a daredevil motorcycle show where two riders rode inside a giant cylindrical concrete hole, mostly riding on the walls.

Those days gave way to sophisticated theme parks like Disneyland, Six Flags Magic Mountain, and Universal Studios in the US, where I went on vacation as kid as well as for my honeymoon.

And now, Singapore has its own theme park -- Universal Studios Singapore, located in Resorts World Sentosa.

My first impression was how small the place was. I was used to sprawling grounds but upon inspection, I realized that while the physical size of the park was compact, they managed to squeeze many rides and attractions in the smaller space, kind of like Singapore itself, cramming everything into a small amount of space.

Either that or when I was a child, my legs were shorter and distances felt further. (cont'd)

CNNGo video: First ride on the Battlestar Galactica roller coaster

I kinda smuggled my Vado HD camera onboard to capture the first ride on the gut-wrenching Battlestar Galactica ride at Universal Studios Singapore, for CNNGo. Sorry for some of the shakiness, I was pulling several Gs during some of the turns.

Joy dances with her pompoms

My four-year-old youngest daughter Joy shows us her cheerleader skillz. Where does she learn these things? LOL

mrbrown goes to YOU... powered by Citi!

Here's a video of my day Ngee Ann City Civic Plaza checking out a carnival organised by Citibank. I tried to find ways to spend the points on my special card on the food and games!

I totally enjoyed my time with Pat "Lara Croft" Law.

They have another one happening on the 27th of March at Plaza Singapura! Go check it out!

Insing column: mrbrown and the bicycle ride

Latest weekly Insing column is "mrbrown and the bicycle ride"

Excerpt:

It is 4am. My iPhone is ringing like an air raid siren, trying to wake me up. I try to ignore it a little longer. I don't usually wake up this early. I usually sleep at this hour. But I have a bicycle event to attend and need to get there by 5.30am before the flag-off.

Yes, I was one of the 9,000 cycling at OCBC Cycle on Sunday.

I was doing the 40km Challenge on my folding bicycle named Sasha, a Dahon Mu P24.

I decided to grab some food at Suriya's Curry House, a 24-hour prata place near my home. Breakfast was a lovely Maggi Mee Goreng washed down with some Teh Oh Ice Limau. I read some cyclists saying on their blogs that their preparations for the ride included carbo-loading. I reckoned Maggi Mee Goreng was "carbo" enough.

The only preparations I did before the day itself was to make sure my bicycle was working (rear brakes needed to be replaced), that I had clean underwear, and the batteries in my lights were charged. (cont'd)

What Singaporeans look for in Google

My reader Ashley sent me an email regarding this little Google Singapore thing. Go to Google.com.sg and type "Why" and then a space, and see what Singaporeans search for the most.

Quite eye-opening, yes?

Insing column: mrbrown and the magic

Latest weekly Insing column is "mrbrown and the magic"

Excerpt:

My wife has recently developed an interest in magic. Not just any old magic, but the street magic of a certain Cyril Takayama.

The dashing illusionist of Ryukyuan and French descent has been seen on cable TV doing his street magic in cities like Taipei.

The man would cook instant noodles with just cold water in front of young people at Xi Men Ding shopping district, or do some coin thing in a fancy club with some sexy woman as his ooh-ahh target.

The wife was so fascinated with his brand of magic that she went online to hunt down his YouTube videos, most of which were from his programs in Japan.

"No, lah, I like him for his magic only," my wife said to me when I came home one evening and caught her transfixed on the television. (cont'd)

YOU… Powered by Citi

Ryan and I will be down at Ngee Ann City this Saturday (13 March 2010) for a carnival called YOU… Powered by Citi (here is their Facebook page). Attendees get a complimentary card with 100 credits in it to use for the games and food, and even a chance to win prizes like a big screen tv.

Bloggers who want to check out this event can get a special invite with extra benefits. All you have to do is email Ling at [email protected] and ask for an invite.

Here are the details of the event:

Dates: 13 March – 14 March 2010
Venue: Civic Plaza, Ngee Ann City

See you all there!

CNNGo column: How do we make Singapore soccer great again?

Latest CNNGo.com "Say What? with mrbrown" column: How do we make Singapore soccer great again?

Excerpt:

I watched a live football match recently. It was an Asian Football Confederation (AFC) Cup match between Singapore's Geylang United versus Hong Kong's NT Realty Wofoo Tai Po FC.

I haven't been to a football match in Singapore for a long time and since my buddy Ryan got us complimentary tickets, we decided to make the outing to Jalan Besar stadium. Ryan's friend "Horse Buddy" got them for us. He is named after the horse racing magazine of the same name (马友指南) as he is rarely seen without this horse racing bible.

Singapore soccer isn't exactly English Premier League standard. In fact, I don't think it is even at the standard of the EPL Stadium Toilet Cleaners' Weekend Football League (if there is one). Most of us who used to watch local soccer feel that since Singapore pulled out of the Malaysian League after the 1994 season, soccer in Singapore has never been the same. In fact, since then, it has pretty much sucked.

Horse Buddy told me the Singapore League (or S-League as it's commonly known) matches on Fridays were particularly interesting though. According to him, there's no entrance fee on Friday matches and there are usually 400 packets of beehoon or nasi lemak (fragrant coconut rice) given away. (cont'd)

the mrbrown show: married not enough

Ministers are always there to lend a listening ear and a pledge of support for your time of need. Call one at mrbrownshow.com!