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I love how Straits Times' so-called one-stop General Election portal is designed.
PAP gets a menu for themselves. And the Opposition parties have to share a drop-down menu. It's like there's PAP, and then there is Others.
See, even Ho Peng Kee seems to be asking, "Eh, why cannot put PAP and Opposition parties under one drop-down menu entitled Parties leh?"
Of course, you are going to tell me, PAP got more news mah. So it needs its own direct menu link. Riiiiight.
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In the interest of fairness, and to prove I have nothing against the lovely Tin Pei Ling from PAP, I have to confess that I too, have a photo where I did the two-finger cute sign.
This was taken when I was in Phnom Penh last week. While I was not willing to upload it at first, I was threatened by dark forces that my other photos, showing me doing even more un-cute gestures, will be released into the Evurl Ingterneck.
So here I stand before you — clutching a rather fetching hibiscus-coloured Kate Spade bow tote — a man chastised and humbled.
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Mr Lim Boon Heng, when introducing some new PAP candidates to the press, spoke on the thankless job of MPs: "When Jesus healed ten lepers, only one came back to thank him."
That's a great parable to tell. However, I am not sure if it works here.
@oblige says: "Mr Lim, you got salary + pay rise. Jesus where got"
@desmondkwan says: "I REALLY dun mind earning $1m a year and not get thanked. seriously"
@davechau asks, "How much did Jesus charge those lepers?"
@forceluke asks, "And what miracles hath thou done?"
@Fumatic asks, "So how many lepers did Lim Boon Heng cure? And was he on foot or in a BMW?"
Perhaps Mr Lim Boon Heng should try some other parables next time.
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It was inevitable. Once that photo of the maid carrying the full pack of the recruit was out there, the parodies would begin.
Some tried to make it look like the original was actually a Photoshop job but as many pros will tell you, it wasn't a very good maid removal job.
Here are few inspired ones I have seen on Facebook (if you did it, let me know and I will add the credits):
My Maid, Our Army
My Maid, Our Army 2
1st FT Battalion
SAF Core Value 7: Care for Soldiers
Maid-soldier goes on route march
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This is PAP's youngest candidate introduced so far. Her name is Tin Pei Ling.
Personally, I think she needs to do the other 9 cutesy finger poses if she wants to be taken seriously by the electorate.
This girl can do seven:
This babe can do all ten:
As you can see, the competition is very stiff out there. But Pei Ling has her secret weapon too. This foot-stomping video from a PAP event, where is doing her part as "MC Kenna Hammer".
Hey, I thought Hammer is the symbol of Workers' Party?
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Inspired by PM's call to "calm down, and detach yourself, think carefully before you vote", I created this poster.
You have to thank the British gahmen for this one.
Click this twitter hashtag: #pmsaysthinkcalmlyb4voting for more reasons you should Keep Calm and Calmly Vote.
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Seen circulating on Facebook: Forget the 3G Soldier, this is the 4G Soldier… and his Fullpack 2IC.
Does the young man also make his maid go for his IPPT & route marches too? Or is it strictly a book-in, book-out only arrangement?
I think we should not be too harsh on the boy. He is, after all, doing what Singapore likes to do: getting foreigners to do work that we don't want to do ourselves.
One day, this fellow will be able to tell his son how grueling his NS was.
"Three maids to carry your backpack? In my time, we only had ONE maid, boy! Your generation getting soft, I tell you!"
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Latest CNNGo.com "Say What? with mrbrown" column: Back to basics in Cambodia
Excerpt:
Nothing makes you wish that the Internet was more mobile-friendly than when you're in a village in the middle of Cambodia with only your iPhone, a mobile sim-card and a spotty connection.But I am here for some relief work in the villages which is more important than getting my data plan working. Still, this Singapore boy has a lot to learn about kampung living.
For one thing, my homestay has an outdoor toilet. Not a toilet down the hall from our room, mind you. No, sir.
It is located across from our wooden hut, requiring a walk over muddy ground (it has been raining on and off for the last few days).
The water in the loo is clean but not drinkable and has a funky metal smell. So every day, we brush our teeth with drinking water from a mineral water bottle. (cont'd)
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Seth spoke to Conan about his trip to Singapore to promote The Green Hornet. And gave a very, er, interesting take on his impressions of Singapore.
I found it hilarious, both the true parts and the not exactly accurate parts.
"So far, so good!"
That's gonna be my catchphrase for a while.
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The Online Citizen had this photo on their Facebook page and asked for captions.
I decided to do my own version:
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I live for moments like these.
The Wife's two friends set up an elaborate ruse to take her out to dinner while twelve of us, my kids and other friends, waited at the KTV with the cake to surprise her.
While waiting, Isaac and Joy and their new friend sang and danced to their favourite songs like Lady Gaga's Bad Romance, and Justin Bieber's Baby. Over and over again.
We had to pry the remote control from them when the party started to end the Biebermania so that we could sing some of our oldie English and Chinese hits.
The little party of 15 people took a month to plan, with crazy moments like last minute date changes. And a stupid husband (me) who almost messed up the plans because he thought he had to bring the kids to the pre-party dinner, instead of straight to the KTV after the Wife's dinner.
But my silliness was fixed on time and the surprise could proceed without a hitch.
I think the Wife was totally touched by the gesture and we got to hear her sing her signature Faye Wong tunes.
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I tried my hand at golf recently on the invitation of the folks at Swing Perfection, indoor golf, to be exact.
Using advanced simulators, I could golf at Pebble Beach or any of the many courses in their servers.
The guy above is not me. I was swinging and missing just about every shot and looking very unglam. So I decided to show you the photo of someone who knew what he was doing with a golf club.
They have cameras that can track your swing so that a coach can tell you how to improve it. The computer can show you the correct posture and super-impose your image on the screen to see if you got it right.
After a few swings and missing the ball a lot, I decided to just watch others play.
They have private golfing rooms too, but I preferred to hang out at the bar counter.
You can find out more at www.swingperfection.com.sg. The shop is located at Killiney Road, next to Comcentre. Meanwhile I am plotting to see if I can replace the software in their systems with some Call of Duty. Should be fun to play an FPS here too. Heheh.
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I don't recall PAP first-time candidates being called "PAP Newbies" in the nation-building press.
They are usually called "New PAP candidates" or "New PAP Faces" or the "nucleus of the 4G Leadership".
But the papers seem very keen to call the Opposition ones "Newbies".
Featured Comment:
From Shroom:
This is what I call seh moh.
Trying to read intention behind one word.
Could it be there was no space in that small box for new faces?
Cannot be lah, must be sinister intentions.
Although you should try going to newspapers.nl.sg and doing a search for PAP and newbie to see how many times PAP first-timers have been called newbies.
Mr Brown trying to earn opp cred?
Featured Comment:
Criticalist said...
To Shroom,
I used LexisNexis which catalogs all ST articles in the past 10 years and searched specifically for "PAP newbie" and returned only TWO results in 2006. Both referred to Baey Yam Keng as the PAP newbie. More importantly, both were talking about his metrosexual fashion style, and in relation to PAP veteran Othman Wok. The articles were dated 28 and 30 April 2006. In linguistic terms, the word "newbie" is used in relation to the person's fashion sensibilities, and not to his political capacities.
You need to see how 'newbie' is used - in what context. For example, in the example cited by mrbrown, the term 'newbie' is associated with the opposition party, and placed in contrast to the term 'new face' from the PAP. This puts 'newbie' in a derogatory meaning of the term.
However, ST did use newbie in one specific instance in its 10 year history - when the PAP won the elections in 2006, and it designated the new MPs 'newbie'. Here, in this particular context, newbie is not counterposed with any term but is used in a positive light - a MP who won the election but is simply new, not amateurish.
Example:
"Lawyer Hri Kumar from Bishan-Toa Payoh GRC echoed this sentiment, saying that the lack of a contest is 'not our fault'. 'The opposition knows they have a very poor chance of gaining any ground here,' said the 39-year-old newbie." [Source: "14 PAP new faces get through in walkovers" 28 Apr 2006]
Compare that with how opposition 'newbies' are portrayed:
"The newbie (Sylvia Lim) will face the PAP team led by Foreign Minister George Yeo." [Source: "First-timer in single seat? WP 'dares to be different" 28 Apr 2006]
Here the 'newbie' is seen as the amateur who must 'face' a team led by a "Foreign Minister", ie someone authoritative.
So I'd disagree that a simple article count of instances of the use of newbie is sufficient. You need to see it in the context within which it is used and here, mrbrown is correct even though he did not analyse the text linguistically. The term 'newbie' used on opposition party members is intentionally meant to be derogatory.
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Latest CNNGo.com "Say What? with mrbrown" column: 'Tis the season for a pay hike
Excerpt:
“Wages up 5.6% amid rebound” trumpeted a news report, as if all of Singapore got a raise.It looked like they almost wanted to add a “Woohoo” to the headline.
The news report said that the average monthly earnings of a worker in Singapore rose to S$4,089 (US$3,190) from S$3,872 (US$3,021) in 2009, based on earnings figures released by the Ministry of Manpower.
Based on last year’s inflation of 2.8 percent, the report said the 5.6 percent increase was adjusted to a more modest 2.7 percent in real earnings.
This year inflation is expected to hit 4 percent.
I suppose inflation is why the President will be getting a whopping S$890,700 (US$695,000) pay hike. (cont'd)
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I watched this old video clip of Sylvia Lim that was circulating in Facebook recently and found that the most fun part was looking at the faces of the ministers and MPs in Parliament as Sylvia spoke on ministerial salaries in Parliament, in 2007.
I wonder what they were thinking then. Can't be that fun to sit there while the Opposition brings up a touchy topic like your salary and how high it is.
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We brought the kids to Universal Studios for the first time a few weekends ago. The wife and I have been there before but this time, it was Isaac and Joy's turn. We wanted to take Faith along but her autism doesn't like crowded places much, so Grandma took her to the park near our home instead.
Isaac could not resist standing on this manhole with steam coming out of it. I think it was meant for Marilyn Monroe shots.
Going with the kids means that we were going for either the milder rides or the shows, like the Waterworld stunt show. No Battlestar Galactica for this outing. Just as well, the queue was 85 minutes for that ride.
I don't know where the kids get their energy. It was hard to keep up with them the whole day.
That's why shows with air-conditioned interiors were a welcome respite from baking in the sun. Like the Shrek 4D show.
The kids zonked out on the car ride home, their batteries fully depleted. One outing on my Do List ticked off.
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UCLA student Alexandra Wallace must be the most popular white girl in school with the Asians after she posted this rant about Asians in the library. Her racist rant elicited not just outrage but hilarious responses from Asian comedians on Youtube. Here are a few:
Jimmy sings the catchy tune about "ching chong ling long and ting tong".
TheNewDraculo remixes her ching-chongs into a great tune.
Xuyah talks about white girls in the library.
Comedian David So gives his take on her rant.
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