mrbrown.com

Taking Faith's passport photo

You want a photography challenge? Try taking your kid's passport photo yourself. Try taking your kid-who-has-autism's passport photo yourself.

It took the whole family to help take Faith's photo. Isaac to hold the makeshift light (with his kaypoh young sister, Joy getting in the way), the wife to hold her still and poke Faith's tongue in, me to take the shot when trying to get Faith to look at me.

To Faith's credit, she did make an effort and even tried to smile, except when she smiled, she closed her eyes. When she looked at the camera, her tongue-sucking reflex kicked in. When we got her tongue back in, and she smiled, she was looking away from the camera. The autism messes up her coordination but she was really cute.

The last photo was what I used in the end, after some editing to ensure the photo met the ICA's very strict guidelines.

Car conversations with the kids

This being the school holidays, we end up going out more often with the kids. This usually entails a lot of time in the car together and the child noise level can sometimes get to me, the long-suffering driver.

Me: "Oi, all you kids in the car stop being noisy! It's driving me nuts."

Joy, 6: "You mean you are now an acorn?"

Everyone's a comedian in this household.

The wife and I try to keep Faith, Isaac and Joy entertained as much as we can (Faith is easier since she just likes to look out of the window). Games are a fun way to do this. I started singing songs with "banana" as the lyrics recently. First with Beethoven's Fifth Symphony.

"Ba-na-na-na! Ba-na-na-na!
Ba-na-na-na, ba-na-na-na, ba-na-na-naaaaa!
Ba-na-na-na, ba-na-na-na, ba-na-na-naaaaa!
Ba-na-na-na!
Ba-na-na-na!
Ba-na-na-na! Na, naaaaa!"

You get the picture.

It soon extended to other songs, like The SWAT theme, Lady Gaga's Bad Romance and the Glee version of Don't Stop Believin'.

You will be surprised how many songs can be sung with just the word "Banana" as the lyrics.

We had the kids singing along to my silly Banana song game, which entertained them for a few minutes.

Then they got back to talking loudly and arguing over small things. Needing some peace and quiet from the 8-year-old and the 6-year-old in the car, I announced the Quiet Game. Whoever spoke first loses.

We had 10 minutes of silence.

If I had known this was so effective, I would have used this years ago. It helps when you have competitive kids.

Joy broke silence first. She just HAD to ask, "Are we there yet?"

I didn't want her to feel bad about losing so we had Round Two. I even tried to bait Isaac into talking by mentioning his Christmas present and saying I might buy him something he didn't want.

"You know, Mommy," I said, making sure Isaac could hear me, "I think I will get the Transformers for his Christmas present instead of the Megazord he mentioned."

The wife stifled a giggle.

But Isaac was a rock. He kept his silence until I declared that the round was over and that both of them had won.

Without missing a beat, he burst forth with, "Papa, I didn't say I wanted Transformers leh."

The wife and I tried very hard not to laugh out loud for the rest of the drive.

Joy films her life

Youtube link: http://mrbrwn.co/uBVJLf

Somehow, my youngest daughter, Joy, figured out how to use my wife's iPhone 3GS video camera and decided to make a little movie...

This is what the world looks like through the eyes of a six-year-old.

Singapore no longer least corrupt, drops from 1st to 5th

The new king of the hill is New Zealand.

In the Least Corrupt Country rankings, the scores were:

1. New Zealand: 9.5
2. Denmark: 9.4
3. Finland: 9.4
4. Sweden: 9.3
5. Singapore: 9.2

Although we dropped five places, the non-governmental corruption watchdog Transparency International, who do the annual survey, said our dip was "insignificant".

But in the words of High Expectations Asian Father:

Son, I am disappoint. Perhaps we need to pay our leaders even more.

Now you can e-bank with more peace of mind (but with bigger pain of ass)

Just as I was complaining the other day about how I no longer use internet banking because my bank uses this security token instead of an SMS OTP method of authentication, they announced that they will offer an even BIGGER dongle:

Gee, thanks.

Sure I understand it is more secure, but there is a fine line between security and making something so inconvenient that people can't be bothered to use the service anymore.

I can't wait to see their next super-super-secure e-banking token…

那些年, 有很多美好的回忆…

Everyone was telling me I should watch this Taiwanese movie called You Are the Apple of My Eye, or in Chinese《那些年，我们什么什么你妈的什么追什么很长的名字什么女孩》(I may have gotten the Chinese title a little wrong).

If I ever made a Chinese movie, it would probably be entitled 《那些年，我老妈用藤条打我打到屁股开花》.

So I asked my Twitter friends, if you made a 那些年 movie, what would it be?

1. @dinnie:《那些年，我坐在厕所吃午餐》(cos I had no friends) #那些年 Me: 很可怜喔！
2. @Eugenelkx: 《那些年,警察穿短裤!》 #那些年
3. @mrbrown: 《那些年，地铁没有那么拥挤的日子》 #那些年
4. @chae0516: 《那些年，我媽說我是垃圾桶撿到的孩子。》T_T #那些年
5. @chiaaa: 《那些年，恐龙走马路！》 #那些年
6. @xiaoomantou: 《那些年，躲在楼梯口哭不敢回家因为学校测验不及格》 (based on a true story) #那些年
7. @dombung: 《那些年，我们一起买便宜的屋子和汽车》 #那些年 Me: 现在买个屁啊！
8. RT @avalon: 《那些年, I didn't speak Mandarin until I was 12.》 #那些年 Me: I started at 35.
9. @mryikai:《那些年，我大便的时候要我阿嬷来擦屁股》 #那些年
10. @ctham:《那些年，去长江看艺术片的日子》 #那些年
11. @kixes: 《那些年，我相信长大了会有自己的HDB》 #那些年 Me: Still can, COV +$80,000 lor.
12. @dinnie 《那些年 , 属于新加坡人的新加坡》 #那些年
13. @KendricKHJH:《那些年，我们在用ืNOKIA的日子》 #那些年
14. @sijiathetiny:《那些年，我觉得我的Gameboy Colour 很酷。》 #那些年 Me: 《那些年，我的母亲连Game and Watch都不买给我！》
15. @fab_xl: 《那些年, 咖啡店卖面的都是新加坡人》 #那些年
16. @the_xiaobaitu 《那些年, 藍藍的天空銀河里，有只小白船》 #那些年
17. @DanielFoodDiary: 《那些年，我们一起追的女孩 is 周慧敏》 #那些年 Me: 我的是Joey王祖賢
18. @JoceSuika: ≪那些年，叫做mr brown的都是西洋人≫ #那些年
19. @PARROTTAENGOO: 《那些年 Mediacorp 还叫 TCS 的时候》 #那些年 Me: My time is RTS and SBC, ok?
20. @wearenogorillas 《那些年，我们狂存储买郭富城的卡带》 #那些年 Me: 脱裤城！
21. @DanielFoodDiary《那些年，@Fake_PMLee 追的女孩叫 Miss Ho》 #那些年 Me: 不是INTRO的meh?
22. @smidgenoflove 《那些年，在家里放LD唱卡拉OK》 #那些年 Me: I had an LD player too!
23. @hai_ren 《那些年, 游戏场地上有沙》 #那些年
24. @jennyteo 《那些年，我们持有 Singapore / West Malaysia 蓝护照的日子》 #那些年 Me: I had that blue passport too!
25. @SGproblems1《那些年, 不會被STOMP》#那些年
26. @BB_See: 《那些年，没有GRC的日子》 #那些年
27. @ting1329《那些年, 我妈要把我卖给 Garang Guni 的日子》 #那些年
28. @EuniceLim《那些年, 我们走STEADY的日子》#那些年
29. @kallangfortis《那些年我买Apple ][为了玩Karateka》 #那些年 Me:I used Apricot computer from People's Park.
30. @mrbrown《那些年, 我追的一个女孩》 #那些年 http://mrbrwn.co/sf0ULj

I know, I know. It is very unsettling to see mrbrown tweet and blog in Chinese.

Hey, Lee Kuan Yew says bilingualism very important, ok? And I want my kids to know that even though their father (me, not LKY) didn't do that well in Chinese when he was young, it is never too late to start.

P.S. The movie's name is, I found out later, 《那些年, 我們一起追的女孩》.

Who Moved My Curry Sauce?

What's worse than running out of everyone's favorite curry sauce? Bringing it back & changing the taste.

Facebook links here and here.

Then again, it's curry sauce. GET A GRIP, PEOPLE!