The Minster of Defence has announced that NS IPPT will be reduced to 2.4km run, push-ups and sit-ups.
Now Lao Peng can say, "In MY time, IPPT was FIVE stations, ok? 2.4km, sit-ups, chin-ups, shuttle run and standing broad jump! And push-ups were used for punishment only. Last time, we collected rubber bands as we ran around the stadium, ok? And the black swimming trunks DAMN ugly, can? You young punks are so lucky."
@Miyagi thinks that next year IPPT will be reduced to one station: slow walk to canteen break.
I think in the near future, it may be even further reduced to 2.4m slow walk to the secret smoking point. And your maid can do for you. Reservists (NSmen) in their 30s or older are allowed to let their NSF sons do their reservist IPPT for them.
In view of the new shortened three-station IPPT, IPPT will be renamed IPT, Individuals Pass Together.
Because of the reduced need for Physical Training Instructors (PTIs), half of the current PTI force will be sent to Guardsmen and Commando course for upgrading. The remaining PTIs will be sent for Encouragement training, to help them cheer servicemen on during the new reduced IPPT, in the four national languages.
PTIs will also now need to provide high-fives and group hugs.
There will be no pass or fail or gold or whatever in the new reduced IPPT. Servicemen will fall under broad categories of Well Done, Not Bad and Good Effort. This is to ensure that they do not feel discouraged by any physical fitness shortcomings and damage their fragile self-esteem.
RT will also cease to stand for Remedial Training. It will end years of soldiers using the term wrongly, as in "You kena RT training ah?", as that would mean one is saying "You have Remedial Training training ah?".
It's like people who say ATM machine.
RT will now stand for Relaxing Tekong. Servicemen who feel like they should do better for the new IPPT can opt to go for Relaxing Tekong, a new spa, facial and fitness centre located on exotic Pulau Tekong, to improve their wellness.
With the new reduced three-station IPPT introduced, the chin-up bars at public park fitness corners will be re-purposed for use in MRT trains for standing passengers.
As push-ups are now part of the official IPPT, the new military punishment will be twenty mild squats.
BREAKING NEWS: The Ministry of Defence Fitness (MINDEFF) would like to clarify that the new IPPT is push-ups, sit-ups and a 24km run.
They apologize for the extra decimal point.
MINDEFF also announced that if servicemen do not wish to do the 24km run, they can opt for the alternative three-station IPPT where you do the sit-ups and push-ups… while doing the 2.4km run. Below ten minutes. To pass.
[Photo via Mindef and some Ch 8 show]
