Pa sat at his kitchen counter, sipping on the flat white he just made. As he read the article, his curiosity was piqued. Was it true? Is Gen Z unable or unwilling to read in Third-Person Omniscient anymore?
Just then, his son, Isaac walked by. He looked at Pa curiously.
“Morning, Bruh.”
Pa said his Good Morning back, and muttered something about not being his bruh.
Isaac frowned and grabbed the open Cheetos packet from the fridge.
I will have that as my breakfast for now, he thought. Perhaps some Mee Kia later when I step out.
As he stuffed his face with the messy snack that pretends to be made of real cheese, his thoughts wandered to more important issues of the day. Should I play my Marvel Rivals game first, or should I submit my university application before the appeal window closes?
Iron Man won that round. There was still time to submit the application, he decided.
Just then, the youngest member of the family came downstairs.
Joy saw Pa lost in his thoughts. She wanted her double shot of espresso so badly, though she didn’t want to interrupt his deep thoughts.
Is he thinking about the Third-Person Omniscient thing again, Joy thought. Of course Gen Z can deal with Third-Person Omniscient, why does Pa think we can’t? He can be such a Boomer sometimes. Wait, is Pa a Boomer or Gen X? I cant remember.
Just then, Pa, looking nothing like someone age 56, looked up from his reading, as if instinctively hearing his youngest child’s need for caffeine. That was his Coffee Spider Sense.
“You want some coffee? I make for you now.”
Joy nodded with enthusiasm, and went to get the oat milk from the fridge. She smiled as she took the carton, knowing exactly what her father will say: You should stop drinking that stuff. That’s not milk. That’s just vegetable water with sugar.
Pa looked up from his espresso machine and over the hum of the rotary pump, said, “You should stop drinking that stuff. That’s not milk. That’s just vegetable water with sugar.”
